This morning I posted a new status message on my Facebook page: “Matt is thinking of cool ways to spend $700 Billion. Any ideas?”
As you might imagine, I got some colorful responses including:
- Lottery tickets.
- Puppies.
- Tequila.
These are all pretty reasonable. But with $700 billion, you’d have $104 to spend on every person on planet earth or $2295 on every American. That much tequila would kill most Chinese people I know. And untrained puppies would add an entirely new dimention of “toxic debt” to American households. So let’s think outside the box…. We could buy…
- Five appointments with John Edwards’ hair stylist for every man, woman and child in America, plus a decent tip.
- Two iPod shuffles (1 gig) for every man, woman, and child on planet earth. Plus a gift card to itunes for six bucks.
- Seven houses worth $10 million each for every resident of Wasilla.
Or, we could just spend it on hookers and blow.
Or we could, you know, like, cut world hunger in half and have some change left over to, you know, like, end hunger in America.
Open thread: What would you do?
I was always told that, if you come into a large amount of money, you should apply it toward debt. But I guess that doesn’t really apply in this situation since this is ADDING debt. So instead, how about a chicken coop and chicks for everyone! They’re more reliable than free, unregulated trade. Back to basics!
Yeah, my first choice would be to use the money to buy up a whole bunch of loans that are never going to be repaid, but since the government already took that idea, I’d probably spend it on a new suit, and never having to make my own sandwiches for lunch anymore.
Step One: Take 1/2 and go to Vegas
Step Two: Bet on black
Step Three: $$$